I got a phone call from a female friend who had met a guy I knew and wanted information on him.
This is fairly common, that whole pre-date interview, “I met him, he says he knows you, I was wondering what do you think of him?”
And that question always starts up a whole allegiance test. Like if your sister asks you about some far-off guy that you used to work with, the things you would tell her about him are vastly different from what you would tell him about her.
If your sister got arrested one time, he might not need to know, or hear it from you. But if he got arrested, you’d damn well better tell your sister she’s considering dating an ex-con. “I heard he ate some people and threatened the witnesses. That’s how he got off scot-free.”
You have to juggle your friends to find out who carries more weight and who gets the full truth.
The problem with this particular pre-date interview was that both friends rated equally with me.
In a tie, for most people, same gender wins. Bros before … err… foes.
This situation was further complicated by the fact that they are both annoyingly complicated people that I wouldn’t consider hooking anyone up with, much less with each other. I can’t even imagine how they met.
I couldn’t tell her about him without pointing out that the same lengthy list of complaints on him were problems I think she also has.
Either I just give her a thumbs up “he’s great”. Or I end up insulting her, which is probably not what she wants to hear.
I want to do neither, to bow out and give her no information. But she’s presistent, she’s squeezing me saying “Is that all? Is that all?” after every single sentence.
So I end the conversation with a simple “Run like hell”.
Then I hang up on her and call him to give him the same advice.
Nobody is hooking up on my watch.