How to behave towards strangers (A guide for Nigerian men)

  1. In public, never offer your help to anyone. It is every man for himself.
  2. Unless it is a woman, then offer too much help.
  3. Be persistent.
  4. Be affectionate. Tell her you love her. It is never too early, women like a man who is in touch with his emotions.
  5. Don’t worry, you will only have to say it this once in your relationship
  6. Be very persistent. It is unthinkable that any woman would be uninterested.
  7. Be helpful. Let her know how useful you can be. Say, “I am the chief inspector of this region, I can make life very easy for you.”
  8. Be flexible. If you are frustrated, change that, say, “I can make life very difficult for you.” Same difference. She just needs to know how much power you wield before she yields. Nobody wants a weak man.
  9. Be attentive. Know how to read the cues: if she smiles politely, she wants you.
  10. If she ignores you, she probably hasn’t heard you. Be physically intimate. Move in closer, get louder, get her attention by touching her.
  11. If she frowns, she definitely wants you. You have stirred up emotions in her that can only be described as love. Start to make plans for the future. Be communicative. Share those plans with her.
  12. If she screams at you, though this is unlikely to happen because you have already offered to help her. I mean, what more can she want. Did you remember to tell her you love her? Put on an angry face. Shout back, “Ah ah what is wrong with this one!” You can add, “Is it because I’m playing with you?”
  13. Be quick to forgive. Immediately smile, return to Step 7 and try again
  14. Be decisive. Whip out your phone and take her number.

11 thoughts on “How to behave towards strangers (A guide for Nigerian men)

  1. I just shared the post with le fan. Le hot sister has a gem for you Tolu.
    “They missed out – if all of these are unsuccessful, call her a bitch and a lesbian…and move on to her friend. Repeat all steps…”
    Update post!

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